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In the Valecian Infertility Institute a study was made with the intention of knowing what Spanish couples need and feel when they initiate the reception of an egg or sperm or both gamete treatments at the same time. Many times, these treatments are the last resource for them.
It is been noticed that, in general, couples have more difficulties when they receive a donated egg than when they receive sperm.
Women relate a worse mood and more worries than men in relation to donation. The biggest receptor fears, in general, are the “rejection from the future offspring to the non-genetically related father” and “doubts about donor”.
Most of future receptors believe they won’t say the reality about their genetic origin, however, many of them have told the secret already to family or friends. A big majority of these couples express the wish of knowing other couples that have experienced a similar situation and they have formed a family already to know their experiences.
In the same study it is demonstrated that, when these couples attend to psychological support and they can be advised and reeducated related to their fears, it exists a big change in their fears and expectations of telling the genetic origin to their children.
It does not exist yet in Spain a legislation that takes into account the level of information that should be given to the conceived children by the new ART (Assisted Reproduction Treatments). Parents are thereby free to choose the information to give to their children about this topic. It exists, the same way than in other countries, divergences between professional from the psychology about when and how tell the truth to their children, result of donation gamete.
Some studies have demonstrated, for few people at least, that the knowledge about their genetic origin is important for their identity development. In regards to this, although many times this topic is been compared to adoption, there are substantial divergences that make de differences. The child that is been born by adoption doesn’t have nor a past or a parents to be looked for him.
We think that couples should always decide what to do and our job is helping in that decision. It will depend on the environment, fears and the psychological preparation for gametes reception. There are tales to introduce children in these topics. On the other hand, in the adolescence or youth is when usually son or daughters make more questions or have more doubts about their genetic origin. Every parent will know the best way to explain to his child the conception and the way to keep the secret.
Even today there are questions and doubts to be resolved by new studies. For this, it is suitable to keep in mind how these techniques affect relationships, specially, to descendent. All these efforts are direct to normalize the assisted reproduction procedures so that the most important thing is “the family” and “the person”. The way of conception is not that important. Nowadays, relationships between parents and children are ground more in raising than in nature (origin). It would be ideal that schools explain the different and new ways of conception.
Children’s Psychology demonstrate that kids have a bigger ability to assimilate the information than adult people, because of that, we consider important to initiate an education stage and transmission of information by them, to educate future generations about the creation of families with ART.
The environment in which any child is grown up determines his habits, costumes, principles, and the meaning of life. All of this is transmitted by parents through education, independently of the genetic makeup.
Independently of being communicated or not, any doubt or difficulty from the parents related to the conception way will affect the relationship with his child. On the other hand, when paternity is lived in a natural way, the relationship will be as normal as any parent.